Three years sounds like a solid amount of time, and when you start university you feel you’ve got mounds of time to kill. But then it hits you that you’re a decrepit finalist, staring at empty pizza boxes, unopened books and piles of notes realising you still haven’t got your crap together. Here are some of the thoughts most, if not all, finalists will have sadly on many occasions:
- Haven’t started my dissertation yet. Probably won’t any time soon.
- I can’t adult. I can’t even microwave food without setting it on fire.
- People keep telling me to apply for one of those job things.
- Alcohol? Degree? Alcohol? Degree? Alcohol.
- How is my laptop still alive?
- I’m just not about that 9AM life.
- Ring binders bought: 10. Ring binders used: 0.
- Work? No I’ll just watch another 5 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy.
- What priorities?
- I have approximately 4,000 unanswered emails. If I ignore them they will probably go away.
- I wonder when the library will start to make me pay rent…
- I could just be a cat lady.
- Is there a job where I could just taste pizza all day? I’ll just do that.
- Marrying a millionaire would definitely solve a lot of my problems. Where do I get one?
- Can we just fast forward to the point where I actually have money and energy? And many puppies. And a huge mansion. And an Amazon Prime account.
- I’ll just do a Masters so I can avoid being a real adult.
- Actually no, I need to actually pass my degree first.
- Oh God.
- Haha. My parents are going to kill me.
Life tends to work out in weird and wonderful ways but likewise tends to make us distressed in many forms. Without all these worries how boring would life be, anyway? Use the time you have left to soak up every moment you have left, before you know it you’ll be stood by the fountain with that precious piece of paper in your hand, wondering how cruel life is for making the time of your life pass so fast. There can be many moments of despair but don’t worry – we’re all in this together! Now get started on that dissertation. Or not.
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