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Ewe’ll never believe this sheepish ca-lamb-ity

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This is only loosely based on fact.

A sheep has been resc-ewe-d from the boot of a car after a vehicle was seen running a red light. Stop me if ewe’ve herd about this before.

A Peugeot was stopped in Loughborough High Street at 20:50 BST on Friday by PC Katie & PC Will. The driver and passenger claimed the animal was legitimately purchased – in fact, they insist they got it for a baa-gain, they “practically fleeced the guy who sold it.” The officers were unable to confirm this, due to a significant lamb-guage baa-rrier with the third occ-ewe-pant of the car, but there is some suspicion that they were just trying to pull the wool over their eyes. Later, they changed their story and claimed they had never met her-bivore. All in all, the occupants were a bit sheepish about their relation-sheep with the farm animal.

The large sheep was in good health and not herd, so fortunately, no lamb-ulance was necessary, and the sheep seemed quite content, drinking lamb-ini and dancing along with the music on the radio – Britney Shears, Lady BaaBaa and Ed Shearan. The animal is being looked after, has been taken to the baa-baa shop for a trim, and was thankful to the officers, who are “by far the best on the force, baa-none.” The occupants are now in contact with a baa-rrister to help their case and keep them out the s-lamb-mer.

The PCs were grateful for the car’s spec, saying more powerful cars, like Lamb-orghinis, would have been impossible to catch. As it was, the officers had to set up a small lamb-ush to stop the driver, before they could do a ewe-turn and escape. One passer by over-herd the driver telling the police to “get the flock outta here” just before being stopped. The car had no MOT or insurance and was seized.

A sheep in the back of a car

Photo by Charnwood Police

On EweTube, InstaRam, Fleecebook and other social media, many flocked to have their say, with a lamb-slide of calls for the men to be charged and thrown behind baa-rs. Some question the motives of the driver and passenger, suggesting they were transporting to an illegal slaughterhouse – a ‘completely baa-baric act’. Others say this doesn’t make sense, as we all know sheep go to die only at baa-baa-ques. Some question whether this was the intention at all. Perhaps a quick holiday to the Baa-hamas or Baa-celona instead – after all, a baa-kini was found alongside the animal.

Charnwood Police commented: “We know this is an emotive subject and it’s one that will be properly addressed as the investigation unfolds.” The investigation continues, with experts in the field, from the Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (Defra) using the ear tag numbers to identify the sheep’s owner.

If ewe want to know how much of this is actually true, read the BBC’s article here. They have much better shear force of will.


Article by David Owens

Thanks to Charnwood Police for the sheepish images

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LSU Media Vice Chair 2020-21 LSU Media Chair 2019-20 Hall Media Coordinator 2018-19

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